November 7, 2009

The ever popular Slappy the Seal
Slappy the Seal – star of the Baumbauer Television Network (BTN) program, “Slap Happy Slappy” died late Monday, off the shores of Norway. Preliminary autopsy results indicate the cause of death as “harpooning.” Officials would not comment on rumors that Slappy was being turned into a hat, tastefully trimmed in chinchilla. The Seal was last seen Friday afternoon, dining with his agent, Rick Jaspers at a sushi bar in Los Angeles. Jaspers was unable to explain how his client ended up halfway around the world.
Slap Happy Slappy was the highest rated children’s program on BTN, and featured The Seal performing various tricks for a studio audience of children – in between Japanese Anime cartoons.
News of the show’s fate came swiftly.
Baumbauer Entertainment, CEO, Horrace Baumbauer announced the immediate termination of the program – calling for the entire studio to be gutted and steam cleaned. When asked to comment, Baumbauer stated “the whole place smells like low tide.” When pressed on the subject of Slappy himself, Baumbauer denied being particularly fond of the aquatic mammal, describing him as a “money grubbing whore.”
AB
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Hollywood, Slappy the Seal | Tagged: Slappy the Seal, Children’s show stars, Hollywood deaths, child stars, dead celebrities |
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Posted by alanboardman
October 28, 2009

Here is how I see the 2009 World Series.
Starting Lineups: Close but a two hundred and fifty million dollar payroll buys a lot.
Advantage Yankees
Starting Pitching: After Cliff Lee who do the Phillies have, Pedro? Despite what he did versus the Dodgers I am not convinced.
Advantage Yankees
Bullpen: One word, Mariano
Advantage: Yankees
Bench: Joe Girardi has no reason to use his bench other than when they are in a National League ballpark because they have an all-star at almost every position.
Advantage: Phillies
Manager: Charlie Manuel is no Dick Williams but Joe Girardi? Please, he likes to play with his toys too much. He manages a game like he has to prove how smart he is.
Advantage: Phillies
Intangibles: The Phillies seem to find a way to win.
Advantages: Phillies
Umpires: Not even close. There will be several bad calls and certainly a few controversial ones. As a result, somehow and someway the Yankees will get more calls their way.
Advantage: Yankees
Series MVP: Jorge Posada.
With all the silliness of him catching or not catching, I believe he will have a great series. Plus he is a switch hitter. Besides although I am no fan of the team from New York, I like Posada.
Bottom Line: Yankees in 6.
Question: Which is worse? A whiney Red Sox fan or a spoiled, obnoxious Yankees fan?
Answer: I’ll let you know when the series is over.
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World Series | Tagged: 2009 World Series, Derek Jeter, New York Yankees, Philadelphia Phillies, World Series predictions |
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Posted by alanboardman
October 25, 2009

Route 72 looking west to Lincoln Avenue
These photos were taken this morning of Route 72 looking west to Lincoln Avenue (behind the Stop & Shop). Notice the leaves blocking the drain? That can’t be good. Following last night’s rain storm there is two inches of standing water.

Close up view
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Route 72 |
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Posted by alanboardman
October 18, 2009

Looking west below the bridge
Well, it only took a year but the still uncompleted Route 72 Extension has graffiti on the Forest Street Footbridge.
I was there almost one year ago and there was not even a scribble. Today it is riddled with all sorts of foul language.
On second thought it is not graffiti. It is vandalism.
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Route 72 | Tagged: Connecticut Department of Transportation, Department of Transportation, DOT, highway construction, Route 72 |
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Posted by alanboardman
October 12, 2009

Forestville Little League
A little birdie told me there was a “secret” meeting held at the Forestville Little League (FLL) complex two weeks ago to discuss the fate of the league. No minutes were taken and no decisions made, but one influential board member lobbied for the league to fold due to its lack of success at the tournament level.
Pardon me but, WTF?
I don’t usually comment but these things work in cycles. While there may be a lack of recent success at the tournament level but so what. Is this about tournament championships or teaching kid’s baseball and life lessons?
Forestville has a long history of winning District Champions 5 Championships staring in 1964 and continuing with titles in 1974, 1975, 1976, 1980, 1982, 1988, and 1989. Of course one would never know this because there are no signs, pennants, or flags about the complex showing their storied history. Unlike McCabe Waters Little League (one of two cross town rivals) which proudly displays their championships on their outfield fences.
Just for the record, Edgewood Little League (the other cross town rival) did not win their first District Championship until 1990 and that league formed in the late 1950s. Should they have folded too?
Don’t believe me about the District 5 information? Well, that can be found here:
http://www.unpage.org/connecticut/
Oh and one more thing. The same little birdie chirped told that FLL Major League Division (Boys 9-12) will play several regular season games versus McCabe Waters in 2010.
AB
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Forestville Little League | Tagged: Edgwood Little League, Forestville Little League, LIttle League, Little League folding, Little League World Series, McCabe Waters Little League |
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Posted by alanboardman
September 10, 2009

The Broad Street Pump Station, Forestville, CT
Following my story last week about the Forestville Sasquatch, I was approached by several residents with varying personal accounts. Some village dwellers, who wish not to be identified for fear of being ostracized by Forestville‘s ruling class, have heard strange intermittent noises over the last month, mostly at night. They also complained of a strange smell that has wafted through the air of late. A few others stated they saw what appeared to be a dark object lurking within the wooded area behind the pump station along the Pequabuck River on Broad Street.
So, Monday evening about an hour before dusk, I made a preliminary trip to the area just to check it out. I walked east along the railroad tracks and slowly crossed the small wooden bridge that goes over the river before navigating my way down along the dried rocky, river bed. There are several paths for hiking near the edge of the river, and they did look recently traversed. However, although there was no evidence of large footprints which are generally associated with a Sasquatch sighting, the forested area did show numerous snapped branches and canopies for something to sleep under.
Rain is predicted for later this week and hopefully my schedule will permit me to investigate the area in more detail this weekend.
Due to credibility issues for some of the eyewitnesses, I must admit this story intrigues me even if I think it is BS.
Here is a satellite link for the area in question.
http://www.bing.com/maps/default.aspx?v=2&FORM=LMLTCC&cp=qybw318xr6bb&style=b&lvl=1&tilt=-90&dir=0&alt=-1000&phx=0&phy=0&phscl=1&scene=17128464&encType=1
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Pequabuck River, The Forestville Sasquatch |
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Posted by alanboardman
September 6, 2009

Forestville's new bump
This is for Solomon Weeks who says I never report on road and travel news.
Due to the Route 72 road construction Forestville has a new bump, depending on weather you are leaving or entering the village on East Main Street. You can’t miss it because there are signs along the side of the road in both directions (east and west) warning the traveler of the bump.
Solomon, are you happy?

The bump has a road sign
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Route 72, Solomon Weeks, Uncategorized | Tagged: Route 72, Solomon Weeks |
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Posted by alanboardman
August 12, 2009

Forestville resident Al Tunis was eating from a can of Pringle Potato Chips yesterday when he claims he came upon a potato chip bearing the image of Jesus Christ, the son of God. “It looks kind of like the Jesus from the Shroud of Turin,” said a surprised Tunis.
The potato chip clearly displays the image of a man with a beard and shoulder length hair. Local church leaders had no coment nor did Pringles.
Mr. Tunis denies he drew the image on the partially eaten potato chip, “How could I do that? I don’t know how to draw.” Uh huh.
Forestville has never experienced anything similar to this. As the situation develops I will post updates.
AB
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Al Tunis | Tagged: Al Tunis, Pringles, Shroud of Turin, The image of Jesus |
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Posted by alanboardman
July 9, 2009

Stop & Shop, Forestville, CT (File photo)
Yesterday afternoon Karen Blaylock broke her pencil while writing her family’s grocery list, according to a source close to the situation. It is not known if she sharpened the broken pencil or discarded it for a pencil in her pencil cup. Due to the mishap, Mrs. Blaylock arrived late at the Stop & Shop Deli, so she was unable to taste the various free sampling of cheeses that were on display.
AB
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Karen Blaylock, Stop & Shop, grocery stores | Tagged: cheese, CT, groceries, grocery shopping, Karen Blaylock, Stop & Shop, Stop & Shop Forestville |
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Posted by alanboardman