Paulie the Paperclip Looks to Make Political History

Artists rendering of Paulie the Paper Clip

Artists rendering of Paulie the Paperclip

State office seeker Paulie the Paperclip, who announced his candidacy last month, told gathered media Saturday at a fundraiser that he will run in both the 77th and 31st districts representing Bristol/Forestville. “It is probably illegal but what are they going to do investigate me? Please. I’m a paperclip,” Paulie quipped.

The peppy and self-absorbed paperclip said he does not want to hedge his bets so he will run for two seats simultaneously.

Paulie currently works full-time as a paperclip holding sheets of paper together at Landry, Issel and Escalanté, a Forestville consulting firm and that job has allowed him to do a great deal of travel often without warning. He has traveled to Accounting, Payroll, Human Resources and Shipping and Receiving all within the company. “It has allowed me to meet a diverse set of people but more importantly for them to meet me,” the infamous paperclip remarked.

If elected, Paulie boasted he would be not only be the youngest paperclip ever voted into elective office, but the only the paperclip ever voted into elective office. “Don’t vote for me because I have good ideas, vote for me because I am a paperclip so I can make history!”

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