Debate Review


The Bristol Chamber of Commerce hosted a debate for local state Senate and House of Representatives candidates Monday night at St. Paul. Due to a prior obligation I was not able to attend. However, The Mole did and here are his observations.

All times EDT

Lots of local celebrities here mingling. Politicians, Facebook stars and big shots. I left my autograph book at home. Bummer.

Debate starts. Did I turn off the lights at the house?

Laura Bartok’s opening statement is really….oooo. My stomach is queasy. Wonder if the bathroom is occupied right now?

Feeling better but lost my seat. What did I miss?

Good sign. Unlike the mayoral debate here last year, no constant ruffling of papers by one of the participants.

Henri Martin reminds me of Harry Truman. Give’em hell Henri!

Time to play Words With Friends because he really isn’t answering the question. What was the question?

30 point Word! Sweet!

Nicastro! Wait for it…Beep! Beep! Beep! What is it with that buzzer?

Pretty sure I turned the lights off.


Hard to see right now. Chasing a couple of Skittles I dropped under my seat.

Great now I have a searing headache. Checking with the women next to me for Tylenol. Oh man I think she fell asleep. Should I wake her? She appears to be a reporter.

Now she’s hushing me. She’s the one who fell asleep in the first place!

Possibly the most personally frustrating debate I’ve ever been to. I could go for a sandwich. This is a high school. Is the caf open? Maybe they have some pimento bread.

How hard would it be to call a timeout right now and ask the moderator to repeat the last question?

Just got the word from two rows back the caf is not open. Major buzzkill.

Losing interest.

Press photographer is leaving he’s had it.

Is this debate still going on? Wish someone would text me. I never get texts when I want them. I definitely didn’t finish brushing my teeth before coming here. I can feel a bit of food right under my gum.

Mr. Del Mastro is about to make his closing comments. He speaks very well and has a few ideas worth considering. It is a good idea that he didn’t….uh oh spoke too soon. He whipped out a piece a paper. Oh Jesus here it comes brace for impact another manifesto.

There is no way I turned the lights off because they are on a timer and it’s broken. Time to go.

The Mole

The election is Tuesday November 8, 2016. Stay informed with Alan Boardman’s semi-comprehensive election coverage.


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