About Alan Boardman

Alan Boardman writes about gossip in the village of Forestville, Connecticut.

Boardman has offices in over 20 countries, some of them occupied. The most recent addition is a bureau in Syria. It was also our most recent addition last year until it was blown up for the third time.

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19 Responses to About Alan Boardman

  1. BOB BOYLE says:

    Does anyone know Kenneth Snipps of Forestville? Whats with him?

    • alanboardman says:

      I get this question every so often. Yes he is real. But he’s…uh…our local conspiracy guy. There is always something going on his world.

      • joanharvest says:

        It seems that Kenneth Snipps stopped in one of our local stores on Martha’s Vineyard this summer. He sent the owners a funny letter asking why they don’t sell fudge in their jewelry store.

        I’ve done a lot of research about him and that’s how I found you. I actually found a song he recorded on the websire Acidplanet. Very interesting.

  2. BOB BOYLE says:

    Alan do I have a wild story about Kenneth Snipps. Would love to share it with you

  3. MMorris says:

    So who is this Kenneth Snipps fellow? Is it a comical creation or does he actually exist?! Is he well known beyond Forestville?

    The reason I ask is that I received a letter from Kenneth. I live in the UK and co-organise an annual country fair. Kenneth (on behalf of his associate Norman Pendelton) offered the services of a naked, greased-up motorcycle stunt act to perform in the main arena at the show!

    Now obviously I realise this is tongue-in-cheek and beleive me, we had a good laugh about it, but how on earth did he come to find out about our event?! The utter randomness of it all is just…bizarre.

    I am intruiged with this character and would like to know more!

    M. Morris
    Shropshire, England, UK


    • alanboardman says:

      That’s funny. Naked motorcycle jumping? I had no idea there was such a thing!

      Kenneth is real and lives in Forestville. I have read some of his letters and I have a few around here somewhere including the responses that if I would love to post but I can’t seem to find them.

      I have no idea how you guys would have gotten on his radar screen.

  4. Amy says:

    Oh my god…my company got a letter from him today saying that he and Norbert Pendleton are building a time machine and need some scrap meatl to finish it “pronto”! It was a very funny letter, and seeing as we have a jokster in our office, I totally blamed him for it! But now that I am reading that others have also received these hysterical letters, I guess I owe him an apology! Too funny!

  5. CPZ says:

    Continuing on the theme of Kenneth Snipps stories,

    I work at a zoo in Massachusetts and we recently received a letter from Mr. Snipps. In this letter he voices his concern for the Forestville Sasquatch. Mr. Snipps is very sad that the sasquatch is so alone and hungry and wants to help. He was interested to see if we could offer any advice as to how to care for him.

    We would like to pass along to Kenneth that it has been our experience that Sasquatch Particularly enjoy Dragon meat. But due to the shortage in dragons lately, you may have to substitute with sea monster or Chupacabra. Smurf berries lightly dusted in fairy dust are also a good sasquatch treat.

    Thanks for the chuckle Mr. Snipps.

    • alanboardman says:

      The Forestville Sasquatch is a lost bear at best. It does not surprise me to hear that Kenny thinks its real and wrote a letter about it.

      Having said that I like your food advice for Bigfoot.

  6. Roma says:

    Hi Alan,

    I grew up in Forestville from 1977 – circa 1997. I miss it with all of my heart and thank you for the pictures and the snippets of news that you post.

  7. Alan and Julie Hayes from Watertown says:

    Anybody figure out yet that Kenneth, Alan, Toby etc. are all made up people by one person??. It’s called schizophrenia!!..This is a man that has all these made up aliases. Obviously out of touch with the world he sits home, makes up fake blogs by Alan which is all about the other made up person Kenneth. He thinks the government and another planet full of aliens will come and get him and his imaginary friends. This dude isn’t funny, he needs some serious psychotic drugs..So maybe the real man here will get help soon. Tell Mork from Ork I said hello. They’re coming for you soon Howard you weirdo!!!

  8. Julie and Alan Hayes says:

    Hello Mr. Boardman, I’m Julie and I can relate to this guy Kenneth Snipps. I am on many antidepressants and have anger mgmt. issues. That’s all I’m saying is that maybe you need help. My son was taken from me when he was an infant because I hurt him and I’ll always think about it. I wish I had gotten the help I needed a long time ago…I have him back now BUT he will know one day that I’m psycho too just like you. Hope this clears things up.

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