FBI to Reopen Investigation into Teapot Dome Scandal

November 2, 2016
1924 political cartoon regarding the Tea Pot Dome Scandal

1924 political cartoon regarding the Tea Pot Dome Scandal

FBI Director James Comey announced Friday that the bureau was reopening its investigation into Hillary Clinton’s email server because it “learned of the existence of emails that appear to be pertinent to the investigation.”

That was not the only announcement Mr. Comey recently made.

Late Tuesday morning Comey was back telling the gathered media that the FBI was reopening its investigation into the Tea Pot Dome Scandal, which ended in 1923 and saw President Harding’s cabinet member Secretary of the Interior Albert Ball go to prison. “Yes, the case was closed 93 years ago and yes, everyone involved is deceased and yes, justice was served but, we have discovered oil reserve leases that may break the case even wider open.”

The bribery and corruption case involving oil reserves in Wyoming and California was the biggest political scandal in the United States until Watergate, and lead to the unraveling of the Harding administration as other acts of corruption were discovered.

Presidential candidate Donald Trump praised the bureau’s decision to reopen, “this dark chapter in American history.” He also noted their probe should be expanded. “People are telling me; I don’t know, but they telling me that they should look to see if there is a connection between Crooked Hillary’s emails and those oil leases. You never know folks, you never know.”

The FBI said they will also reopen investigations into the Newport sex scandal, the Lindbergh baby kidnapping and the Vicuña Coat scandal.

The Warren G. Harding Society of Forestville declined to comment about this story.

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Forestville Resident To Give Lecture About Telephone Poles

January 14, 2016

Lecture Series

The Forestville Lecture Series presents a lecture by local resident Chauncey Meebs this Friday at the Forestville Historical Society.

Mr. Meebs will discuss and present detailed information about the telephone poles in Forestville. He has spent a lifetime cataloging every telephone pole in The Ville. How tall they are. How many there are and where they come from.

The event begins with a buffet dinner from 5:30PM to 6:30PM with the lecture to follow. The cost for the dinner is twenty bucks. For just the lecture it is ten bucks, but only five bucks if you are willing to help clean up.

The Forestville Lecture Series is presented by the Warren G. Harding Society of Forestville, which offers lectures on a wide and diverse range of topics by local eminent authorities.


Mayor wants to Land a Man on the Surface of the Sun

November 3, 2015
Manned mission to the sun possible

Manned mission to the sun possible

Speaking before a sparse audience at the Warren G. Harding Society of Forestville, Mayor Ken Cockayne presented a major policy speech on the eve of the 2015 election. The mayor speaking confidently and with his feet firmly planted on the floor said, “I believe we should commit ourselves before this decade is out, or when my term is up whichever comes first, of landing a man on the surface of the sun and returning him safely back to earth. Seriously…Why are you folks laughing?…I am not trying to be funny…Stop laughing…You’re hurting my feelings…Egor!”

The mayor is often characterized by his opponents as a do nothing mayor. However City GOP leader Derek Czenczelewski said that is not true and this idea proves it. “If we go at night when the sun goes down and land on the dark side of the sun during the winter solstice we can do it, especially if the guy wears a fire retardant suit with all that tinfoil stuff. It would be so awesome.”

Mr. Czenczelewski elaborated further by explaining that the mayor can achieve this goal without raising taxes, and a rocket to the sun would be a significant step towards redeveloping downtown.

Drawing of the "Forestville Rocket" going to the sun.

Drawing of the “Forestville Rocket” going to the sun.


Story Time at the Forestville Library

July 6, 2015
Warren Report

Warren Report

In order to encourage children to learn more about American History on Wednesday at 10 a.m., preschool age children are invited to take an adventure and read the Official Warren Commission Report on the Assassination of President John F. Kennedy.

Portions of the report will be read in a slow and deliberate manner so it will be easy to understand by local educator Lisa Baker. After, the children are encouraged to write their own Warren Report using crayons and paper provided by the library.

Friends of the Library are admitted free; Acquaintances of the Library $2.50, adults $7: and seniors $6.

Sponsored by the Warren G. Harding Society of Forestville.


Acclaimed File Clerk Robert Bland to Give Lecture

June 29, 2015

Metal_File_Cabinet[

The Forestville Lecture Series presents File Clerk Robert Bland, at 7:30 p.m., Friday July 3rd at the home of Forestville resident Cookie Genison.

Bland has filed away millions of files and moved numerous boxes in his career, including accounting, insurance and general memos. His filing and alphabetizing abilities have resulted in positive work reviews and several raises. One supervisor wrote that, “Bland knows what he is doing when he must put a file in a drawer or storage or lift a 30 pound box onto a cart.”

A native of Delaware, Mr. Bland moved to Forestville in 1989 and has served as a file clerk with many companies throughout his professional career.

The Forestville Lecture Series is presented by the Warren G. Harding Society of Forestville and offers lectures on a wide and diverse range of topics by local eminent authorities.


Warren G. Harding Society of Forestville

April 3, 2015
St. Joseph Polish Society Building

St. Joseph Polish Society Building

The Warren G. Harding Society of Forestville gathers in secret once a month at the St. Joseph Polish Society Building to honor the 29th President of the United States.

Members must resemble the former president both in dress and physicality and they are encouraged to write poorly, bribe one another and have sultry affairs just as Harding did.

Although considered the worst chief executive in the nation’s history, the society carries on with a Warren G. Harding Look at Like Contest and a Warren G. Harding Talent Show where members compose and perform original songs about old “Wobbly Warren.”

This May the society will sponsor a Sadie Hawkins Dance for high school students that look like President Harding. Proceeds from the dance are to be donated to the Warren G. Harding High School in Bridgeport, Connecticut, after bribes are paid in the same manner as The Teapot Dome scandal in tribute to the former president.

Warren G. Harding

Warren G. Harding